like, wow.

Last night my family had some kids over. We were babysitting them, more or less, for the evening while their parents attended a party. It was kind of interesting, but the eight year old daughter of these friends of mine came over with a magazine she bought. It was a pop-star type of magazine…full of gossip about Miley Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers, and tons of other preteen stars. It was kind of surprising that this eight-year old girl would have such a magazine, considering her parents were Christians and well, I thought they only had celebrity gossip magazines for adults and teens. NOW they’re for kids!!! GAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!

A little curious (more horrified than interested), I flipped through the magazine…you would not believe how stupid it was. There was a whole article dedicated to the situation in which one of the Jonas Brothers cut their gorgeous locks. The magazine gushed, “Nick admitted the secret reason for cutting his hair: “It was getting really long, so I had to cut it!” the youngest Jonas stated.” WOW! I NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED THAT!! I MEAN, WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT TO CUT THEIR HAIR WHEN IT’S LONG? Wow! Learn something new every day…

daddy rules.

Hahaha!! This had me cracking up, gaaah. Hahahaha!! You HAVE to read this. hahaha. XD So, without further ado, here it is: Daddy’s Ten Rules of Dating.

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you sure ain’t picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes to big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “Barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: “early.”

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to introduce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka – zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies, which feature chain saws are okay, Hockey games are okay, Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveways you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car – there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

Hahahahaa! I told you!! :D Well, I just got home. Lemme change into my pjs first. :D

terrific quotes

At Weddings Old Ladies used to poke me, saying, “You’re next.” This used to annoy me until I started doing it to them at funerals.

Stop, drop, and roll doesn’t work in hell.

I did not slap you, I simply high fived your face.

If we were meant to pop out of bed we’d all sleep in toasters.

Don’t follow your dreams, chase them.

God doesn’t play dice.

Today, I shall be witty, charming, and elegant. Or maybe I’ll say “um” a lot and trip over things.

I shall never ever grow up. Make believe is too much fun.

Don’t forgive people just because you’re weak. Forgive people because you’re strong enough to realize people make mistakes.

Me? Sarcastic? Of course not. I’m far too ditzy to grasp the subtleties of mockery.

Mr. Right is coming. But his plane crashed in Africa, so he’s walking.

I’m in shape. Round is a shape.

---

Ha. I seriously have to listen to Professor Quirrel. XD

why i write.

I'll tell you why I write. I write because there are voices inside my head that knocks at my temple and scratch at my ears, and typing pounds these words into a keyboard and out of my head. I write because I am a teen in a world going mad, and if I don't write I cannot pretend I am not part of the madness. I suspect there are many, many more difficult lines of work than spending long blocks of time rearranging words on blank pages, but as I have no affinity for hunting mountain lions or diving into sewage, I will content myself with carefully going mad. And although I am not in a sewage, I seem to be wading in a muck half the time, and there aren't enough onomatopoeia in the world to describe the racket inside my head. I write to know what I am thinking or not thinking, or pretend not to be thinking, and to make some sense out of the inanities and cruelties of everyday life. I write because arranging constellations of words on blank pages gives me an odd sort of thrill--the same thrill I get when I use a word like "constellation" --and because I do not know where to find mountain lions.

There. I just wanted to post it here, hahaha. Imagine the trouble I would be in if I get caught using the computer for blogging, ha. ^-^

narrative sketch

I think I should probably do better than to gape at ceilings, and so I would just stretch my brain further. And if I can't concentrate on my fanfics, I think I would just write a narrative sketch. About...er, about food? Bags, a place, probably. Uh, no, I got it. Drowning.

She leans against the brick wall, arms crossed, designer shades hiding tired and sunken eyes. Constructed of sleek black leather, the bag slung over her shoulder appears much too heavy for her scrawny, awkward frame to carry. Her deathly pale alabaster skin glows unnaturally in the sunlight. Cheeks, which should contain traces of pink, have no color except for an ashen and sickly grey. Cutting edge, fashionable clothes do not conform to her shape, instead, they hang off of her, causing her to look even more outlandish. Glued to the rough bricks, her delusions of beauty have her appear like a little girl, swimming in her mother’s clothes. Underneath the excessive makeup and glamorous clothes lies a scream for help. Whether she remembers the last time she felt beautiful, it matters not. She only craves someone to notice her, and know her, beyond the exterior. Pushed over the edge, she waits for someone to pull her out of an ocean of lies and deception.

Ha! So that was soooo unlike me. I have to sleep now. Seriously.

where i am.

Oh my God. I can't sleep. I'm an incurable insomniac, wohoooo! And yet I want to take some time and thank the people who had been gracious enough to defend me and my fellow writers in FFnet. Seriously. The word war has got to stop. T_T I know some people are only trying to defend their friends, and it's only natural, but I wish they would stop proving their point at other people's expense. *sigh*

So negative feelings aside...I feel like I can write more. Multiple posts in a day, gosh. You would imagine how utterly bored I am. (And some people would probably wonder how the heck I can manage to feel bored, what with all the deadlines and other stuff I have to do) Well, here goes...

I’m traveling deeper into myself than before. I’m struggling to find reasons for my behavior, I’m at war with my habits. I’m dissatisfied. But I think I’m going to win.

I’m learning and growing into something new. And loving, mostly every minute of it.

I’m reaching my limits, discovering that I can’t love others wholeheartedly on my own, with my own strength.

I’m learning to fight and work at having good, wholesome, honest relationships with other people. It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.

I’m waiting. For a dream I desperately wish to see unfold, but it needs more time to develop.

I’m moving. Exploring. Playing. Trying to give everything I have.

I'm writing. My dreams, my hopes, letting my imagination run free and wander. And no negative comment is going to stop me.

I’m destroying the lies fed to me. They’re not true. They have nothing on me.

I’m accepting everything, the mistakes, heartache, and happiness. Every last bit.

I’m not quitting. Anytime soon.

turning point.

I finally reached it. I’m there. It took long enough, but through the waiting I learned and grew immensely. And I hope that will continue.

I don’t feel a need to defend myself anymore. I don’t feel the need to try and prove anything. Maybe it’s because I realize now, that I can’t. And I really don’t have anything to prove. I’m not better than anyone else, I’m just as messed up as the next person.

I’ve hurt people. I’ve let people down. I’ve been a jerk. People can’t NOT be friends with me and not expect this to happen at some point. And I desperately need God’s grace and forgiveness, as well as friends that are willing to understand my failures, and help me live and learn from losses.

Believe me, I try to do what’s right. I try to admit when I’m wrong, and sometimes that is really, really, hard for me. But no excuses. Living while trying to justify all the places you went wrong is NOT living at all. It’s pretend. And I want real, authentic life. Even if it’s harder and a lot more messy than being perfect all the time.

So, now the ball’s in my court. I’m not sure what to do with it now. But whatever I do from here, wherever I go from this point, it won’t be fake. Or whitewashed.

It will be me. No strings attached. And I’m hope you’re ready.

random thoughts yet again

I probably need to go to bed soon. But I feel the compulsory urge to write. Oh, and to finish my bowl of salad sitting beside me. I’m not even sure what to write about exactly… My brain is fried. Hm…. I think I’ll just start off with some random thoughts…. and I’ll see where I end up.

Random Thought No. 1

What is with people not being careful in what they say to others? Just because you feel something strongly doesn’t mean you should announce it, just because the emotions feels “right” or you think that it won’t effect the other person in a bad way, you’re wrong. Words are powerful. Some words are best saved for someone else in the future. And sometimes, saying something, no matter HOW sincerely, at the wrong time, TOO soon, can really mess someone up in the long run. And I WISH more people would realize this. T__T

Random Thought No. 2

Things haven't really been exactly dandy for me. I get flamed here and there, when all I want is just to write. Yeah, write. Write, write, write.

Random Thought No. 3

I finally figured out how to get an actual, reasonably cool ring-tone on my phone! And it’s exciting! Yay for not having to be on silent mode all the time! WOOHOO!

Random Thought No. 4

I am officially out of salad, thoughts, and time. And so, I now sign off…satisfied, sleepy, and… saving the best for another day.

ariadne-chan

mood: contemplative, tired, etc etc

It’s late and once again, I should be in bed, or even better, asleep. This might seem slightly strange, but I seem to do much better overall when I’ve had sleep.

My mind is too restless at the moment though to even think about quieting down….I can’t settle, I can’t figure myself out. So, here I go on another random, abstract, too long blog post about everything and nothing in my life. Oh yay.

I love where I am in life right now. But it still doesn’t kill the emotions of wishing people from yesterday were still a part of my life. I miss it, but at the same time, living in the past causes you to miss the best parts of today. Sure, yeah, I’m somewhat sad thinking about how A LOT of things turned out, but I am NOT going back to who and what I was previously. And that’s that.

I’ve found recently that my heart can be exceedingly distracting at times, it’s hard to hear, or feel, or even focus for two seconds straight. *sigh*

I’m having a very hard trusting myself for the decisions I need to make/ directions I need to go. Well, if I really think about it, I should be trusting God to reveal the correct choice for the decisions and directions…. but it’s so easy to forget sometimes. I like being self sufficient FAR too much.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m too comfortable in life…. that I’m not getting ’stretched’ enough, or I don’t throw myself ‘out there’ as often as I should. I don’t want to be “ordinary”, or living in half the capacity I could be. I want to be set apart, with a purpose.

It’s August, and it barely feels like the year has even really started…. this month is going to be long for me, I can tell. This month is going to be different than what I originally had thought, I can tell. It’s going to change me. And I’m looking forward to it, regardless of what it brings.

creative post, eh?

So, I have this blog, and I’m therefore supposed to post interesting, relevant, and amusing things on it, right?

Um, it’s not working. At least not right now. I have NO ideas, thoughts, etc etc etc.

But that’s not entirely surprising considering I’ve been using up all my energy and creativity while doing intense measures history, theology, and science…. blah. My blog fails. Ha.

Oh well. Try again tomorrow.

on ice cream

Mom: what can I make for dinner that’s fast, easy, and cheap? I am way too tired to be creative at the moment.

Me: OH! I know! ICE CREAM!!!

Mom: Well, okay. Something fast, easy, cheap, and HEALTHY.

Me: Oh, that’s easy! STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM!!!

Sometimes I amuse myself too much. But at least my mom got a good laugh out of it. =)

countdown

I don’t think it would be possible for me to be any more nervous about tomorrow than what I already am.

Yeah, I’ve prepared as much as possible. Yeah, I know what I’m suppose to do, and how I’m suppose to do it, and what the outcome should be.

And I still feel like puking. Memories are so hard to kill. Especially the bad ones.

I don’t want to go back a third time. Twice is enough.

Grrrrr.

Only several hours and then I’ll know what I wish I knew now. *sigh*